He looked out of his mansion size home at the vast desert
canyons in front of him. The sun of his planet pierced the ground and reflected
off high rises as a glowing red beam that splintered off in all directions.
Today was the day Kal El would become ruler over his planet and his father
would pass the throne down to him. His father Jor El was becoming very old. His
hair was thinning, his breathing was getting heavier with every step, and his
limbs could only take him half as far than before. Jor El reigned for many
years of the great planet of Krypton but now it was time to turn in the towel,
so to speak.
Suddenly Kal El heard a CLICK... CLICK outside of bedroom
door. He walked hurriedly away from the glass window overlooking the city and
opened the door. As soon as he turned the knob to open a flying robot swirled
and dived around his head until it made it to the center of the room and
quickly deescalated to a stop. After a moment of silence within the room the
robot spoke, “Kal El King Jor El is ready to begin your final review now.” As
soon as the robot was done he flew through the open door and vanished. He stood for a moment within the room looking
around at what lie in front of him. He house was painted different shades of
blue and red and the furniture was handcrafted wooden pieces that stood in
elegance bringing an earthy feeling within the home. Kal El continued to survey
his environment because he knew very soon his life was about to change but he
did not realize how much.
He showed up about ten minutes early to his final review.
Could he be fit for this planet as a rightful king, or is his fate filled with
more sorrow than that? He kept pondering. He knew with being king he would
possess powers unlike any he has every experienced and deep down Kal felt like
he could take on it all. Instantanously, the door from which he was sitting
outside waiting opened. His father Jor El came out to great him. Jor El looked
pleased and excited to see his son through warm gray eyes. “Oh, my dear boy.
How long have you been waiting here? Please come in. I have some very unique
news for you.” Before Kal could answered he was rushed into a big room with
windows on all sides. If the glass was not so visble then it could almost feel
like one was walking in the clouds. Before him were a panel of high ranking
officials within the planet’s kingdoms. Anyone from the assistant to the king
or the assistant to the assistants were there. Kal stood with his arms down at
his side trying to monitor his posture. Jor El quickly begins to tell Kal there
has been a change of plans. Kal El shall be sent to earth to help rule and save
the people within it. His cousin Kara Zor El will take the thrown as the ruler
and instead of Kal El he will be called Superman.
Author's Note:
The story I based mine off of was Narayan's Ramayna from the chapter called," Two Promises Revived." There was a man named Dasaratha, who is a king. He is ready to give up his thrown and wants his son to be next in line. I got the idea of the father and son dynamic from this part but I decided to use Superman and his father instead to make my story more interesting. Then something in the story immediately changes and Rama does not become ruler but instead lets himself get exiled, while someone else by the named of Bharatha. I changed my story to be more happy. I decided to let superman become who we know him as through being exiled. So in a way he was taken away from his planet but it was because he was destined for more than the planet he is from. The situation is overall happier. I also selected the pictures I did from google because I wanted my readers to have a better visual of what to imagine what is happening within the story.
Bibliography
Narayan's Ramayana. " Two Promises Revived". Link
Aw this story is cute! I like the ending. I definitely didn’t see that coming whatsoever and that’s what makes a great story. I like your spin on it. It seems like you changed up the story just enough to make it good. I also like how you have some dialogue throughout there but not too much to where it is overwhelming.
ReplyDeleteThe story has a very unique quality about it. It seems modern but also has a bit of old school something in it that I cannot pinpoint but I like it! It is creative and written well! It gets the big points across and also has a sort of “wow” factor to it, especially at the end! Your authors note helped me a lot because I was really confused about what the story was supposed to be and I am sure we all are when it comes to these. I like how you explained the original story in your authors note.
I actually like the fact that you make the idea of Rama's exile to be something more positive than it is portrayed in the original Ramayana! Your description and detailing of your setting was well written. I love the image at the end because Superman is forever my first-ever-childhood hero. Good job putting Superman into this story! I am looking forward to read more story from you.
ReplyDeleteThe detail and description throughout the story gives the story more imagery and meaning. This story seemed very smooth and flowed really well. You had a few spelling mistakes that I know I would have read over too if I was proof reading my own story. My main question is why does the king of planet Krypton possess such great power? I am a fan of superman but I do not know all the facts about his home planet. Maybe you could have explained that whoever rules is given some sort of item that increases their power. Or that the ruler must do some crazy training to protect his worlds people. Besides that everything was clear and flowed smoothly. Perhaps Kal El is so powerful just because he is a part of a royal blood line that has been the ruler over all Kryptionians for a long amount of time? Let me finish this comment by saying I really did enjoy your story, tying the Ramayana to Superman made it interesting and pleasing to read.
ReplyDeleteWow! I love the way that you have revisited some classic comic book characters and drawn on different aspects of the Ramayana to create an entirely different story. I think it’s really interesting to see how you created a very specific sort of caring though aloof dynamic between Kal El and his father. I found this different Superman backstory really engaging, and I’d like to read more of it. The way Jor El made the announcement of this devastating news to his son made me wonder what the driving forces behind his actions were. The way you wrote his character and dialogue made it sound like he really cares about his son and thinks him a capable person to lead – otherwise why would he have told his son that he was meant to rule over and tend to Earth? Accordingly, I kind of wonder why he would have chosen this for his son. I’d also really love to see how you incorporate Kara’s later coming to Earth or how this artistic alteration would forever alter the superhero dynamic. Well done! I really enjoyed this story! Maybe you can write another connected piece at some point.
ReplyDeleteHello! This was a very interesting read. It caught me off guard when I realized it was about Superman! I find it cool that Kor El’s exile isn’t really an exile. His father acts like it’s this great responsibility to be sent to Earth to be a superhero. I wonder what would have happened if Kor El hadn’t been very happy with the decision. Would he have refused? There wasn’t any dialogue for Kor El included after the reveal so I guess we’ll never know! This Final review, is it like something that fates have ordained since birth or is it more like an advisor council to the king? I’ll admit I’m not really knowledgeable in any of the superheroes! If this is something that is explained in one of the comic books or whatnot I’d likely never get the reference. It was a good read though! Have a great day.
ReplyDeleteAnna,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed that you decided to use the Superman father-son dynamic to narrate the Dasharatha’s. As I thought about it, they really do tie together quite nicely. I was also really drawn in by your descriptive details about Jor El’s thinning hair or the handcrafted wooden furniture Kal El’s house. From what I know of Krypton, it was a much more technologically advanced planet than Earth, but I was a little confused by the introduction of a flying robot as Kal El’s appointment advisor since there were not previous indications of technology.
In your author’s note you explained that this was a happy take on Rama’s exile and I do agree, but do you think it could also be the board room of the Gods in the initial meeting of what they are going to do about Ravana? Since they tell Kal El he will be called Superman, it is much like Vishnu being Rama. Superman is in essence an avatar of Kal El, just a crazy thought.
Great job!
Hey Amber,
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you liked the story but I feel like I could have explained my story note better. I took different aspects of what I read and put it together so I did actually get somewhat of my idea from Vishnu being Rama. Also I got the idea of Superman but I did my own take on Krypton. My sorry was not supposed to be exactly like krypton. I wanted to clarify because I felt like you thought I was going for that but I wasn't. I did not want to copy exactly as the comic books say. I made my krypton with Superman more as a regular person than a super being. So in his own he has hand crafted furniture showing more of a home. His home is not about the technology. I added the robot to show that even just like America there are some technological advances but it's not in any way as futuristic as krypton is displayed in the comics. I wanted best of both worlds. It shows my character to be more humble because instead of him having the best of the best, he has handcrafted furniture! Thanks for your input!
As mentioned prior, I took enjoyed the direct symbolism to Rama's exile in the Ramayana. You did a good job in portraying that actually. The open end to the story is something I can enjoy, if needed, it allows you to continue on the information of the Kal El's story, or just leave it as is. I am not a big super hero fan, (aside from satire and dark comics like Watchmen, Old Man Logan and DeadPool) but this was a very unique origin story for Superman. Well Done.
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