Chapter 1: The Last Hit
He pushed her hard against the wall in their living room. They had been having screaming fights for weeks and she felt trapped. Her body trembled in the harsh grasp of his rugged hands. He tossed her around like a piece of junk. Paul crushed every sense of self Sally had. His threats grew louder as the days went on and she could not break free. Sally spent nights awake with bloodshot eyes trying to shut the world around her. She came seconds to ending her own life and spent hours pondering if that would be the better choice. But in this moment in time she could not stand it. He began yelling, "You dumb slut. You will not amount to anything." She hovered in the corner with tears crashing onto her cheeks that were swollen. He began to pace back and forth in front of her, yelling threats with arms whirling at both sides. She looked from her reddened eyes and immediately stood up. She took the lamp that stood on the nightstand that was next to the bed that she was near; Sally whacked him in the head when he got distracted. She ran out the door as he lay unconscious on the bedroom floor. Sally tripped running to the door as the tears on her face began to turn to sweat. She ran out of the house after she quickly composed herself. As she stepped outside she frantically turned her head in both directions as the upper Manhattan streetlights flickered and began to run down the street.
Girl Crying
Chapter 2: Lost and Found
Sally finally stopped running after a long period of time and stumbled upon a homeless shelter. Not knowing anywhere else to go and not wanting to return to the man who has been abusive towards her, she walked in. The place was far from glamorous. It was only made up of a few rooms. One room had rows of twin beds lined up for people to come and go. The cafeteria was bleak and painted white and was filled with cheap dining tables. Rows of cafeteria benches stood sporadically in the room. Volunteers stood around and were walking in and out of the kitchen getting ready for the afternoon meal. The place made Sally feel like she had hit rock bottom. She could not believe this was what had become of her. The pain made her want to surrender but she knew that she had to keep going. Then suddenly she caught a man staring at her and she began to feel flushed. He had manly features and was quite handsome. He stood with broad shoulders and a chiseled jaw. His eyes were a sparkling light blue that reflected brightly under the fluorescent lights.
Harry introduced himself as the director of the homeless shelter. He was smitten with her. He felt a deep connection and felt like he needed to protect her. She was vulnerable in a way no other woman was. It revealed how feminine she was in nature and it intrigued him. She also felt the same about his features. There was an instant connection and within weeks they fell in love. The were two peas in a pod. Nothing could separate them. Even though they were so close Sally was still hiding from Paul. She knew he would not stop till he found her. She kept him in the back of her mind. She knew she was lying to Harry because she did not tell him about Paul. Regardless, Sally could not bear allowing him to get involved. She kept Harry at an emotional distance as much as she could. She would tell him they could make their relationship public when she "gets her life together," but deep down that was far from the case. Sally felt a gaping hole within her. She did not feel her past deserved to be reopened. Maybe Paul would never find her, or maybe she could live free without ever being seen. Her life had been falling apart for ages. It all began when she met Paul. He was always so controlling but to what end? Harry could not love her to the depths of her soul. No man could. But to her surprise, she might finally be wrong.
Couple
Chapter 3: The Haunting Past and The Bright Future
Six months had gone quickly and Sally found a job as a bartender to get by living in a cheap studio in the Bronx. She still was very close to Harry and spent many moments with him. If she was not with him then he was steady on her mind. Harry would surprise her at work but on this particular day he decided to show up to her studio and walk her to work. As he was rounding the corner he saw a strange man handling her roughly. He was drunk and you could tell he was using her to keep himself up. Harry sprang into action and ran towards them. Sally quickly tried to shove Paul off but continued to struggle. Sally yelped," I am so sorry, Harry. This is my ex. I did not want to frighten you with my baggage." She quickly tried to catch her breath. Harry in an irrational state of mind beat Paul's face in as soon as his arm was within reach. Sally fell to the ground beneath her and her eyes started swelling with tears. He finally was able to see what kept her from his love. He picked her up as if she was his bride and he was taking her inside their new home. He whispered sweetly in her ear, " You are safe with me. I will never let another man touch you unjustly." As the police car lights in the background began approaching closer, they still did not stop staring at each other. She began smiling and kissed him passionately and the world around them grew fuzzy. Their love blinded them from all the cruelty around them.
Happily Ever After
Author's Note:
I read through the first part of the book version of R.K Narayan's "The Mahabharata" and created my story based from that. I decided to go with a more realistic approach and incorporate domestic violence. In the story the sons of Dhritarashtra were a family known for demonic birth and were said to be incarnations of demons. They wanted nothing to do but destroy the Pandava family. The sons of Dhritarashtra tricked one of the brothers and took the Pandava family and even their wife Draupadi. My story is based on the ridicule the sons of Dhritarashtra brought to them and the abuse that Draupadi endured. Sally resembles the wife and the two other men represent the Pandava family and Kauravas. I decided to stay with three characters representing the story because I wanted to go more in depth so my readers can follow easier. I wanted the major focus to be on Draupadi. She is represented amazingly within the story. Out of the many stories they had in that time period this story was chosen to be remembered. The way they represent Draupadi to tell a tale makes her character interesting to read about. Draupadi may not be based on a historical figure, but that does not mean she doesn't carry meaning and significance. In modern times abuse, like in the past is common overall in relationships. Women all across the USA struggle with some form of abuse. Draupadi experienced verbal and emotional abuse from the readings. Physical abuse is not the only type of abuse out there. Every woman deals with the abuse differently but overall everyone can agree that abuse is never okay.
References:
Narayan's "the Mahabharata," Link to Reading Online
Background Information about the Mahabharata
I really enjoyed your story. The plot and the description you used were very interesting and helped me stay engaged. I thought it was interesting how you split the scenes up into chapters. It helped me stay organized with the current events. I was wondering how much time went by between Chapters 1 and 2. I know Chapter 3 listed a specific time. Maybe you could tell us more about how Sally and Paul met in the first place. Also, why he started becoming abuse. Has he always been abusive, or is this a recent thing? Maybe giving the couple a little bit of history would be an interesting way to expand the current story's plot. I was also wondering why Paul never called the police on Sally for hitting him or vice versa. Was Sally too afraid of Paul to report him to the police? Why did she never leave? These are just a few questions that I thought would be useful, again for furthering the plot. I really enjoyed the story! It was a very good read.
ReplyDeleteHello Anna! I enjoyed the story you wrote. I will start with the negatives and end with positives. The only thing I didn't really like were the moving pictures. At first I thought it was cool, but trying to focus on the reading with a part of the screen moving in my peripheral vision was a bit distracting at times. The moving pictures definitely hold more meaning to the story, but if other people like me who get distracted easily read it they might have a hard time staying focused. But other than that I thought the story was well thought out and had a good plot that flowed well. Using small chapters that have titles to give a small idea of what you're about to read made it easy to follow what was going on throughout the story. This was an interesting style that I have not seen before but I thought it worked. But as I mentioned above, I am not a huge fan of the moving pictures.
ReplyDeleteI was very intrigued and impressed by your story. I'm a bit of a hopeless romantic, so I liked the love story idea. One thing that I would suggest with your story is to possibly insert a trigger warning or reader discretion concerning the intimate partner violence described at the beginning. Personally, I have not experienced this, but another reader may have. I like how you took a risk and illustrated such a graphic scene. This made the story very realistic. It was descriptive enough that I was able to feel the helplessness that Sally was experiencing. The GIFs that you included were also perfect for the scenes that you created. I like that you split up your stories into chapters, it helped transition. I think that it would be great to provide more information about Harry and Sally's relationship. I know that they experienced love at first sight, but I would like to learn more about how it developed.
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