Feedback Focus

Doing this assignment helped me see a lot of different techniques when learning how to truly comprehend something I read. I really enjoyed the reading out loud technique. I feel like I am able to understand more when I can hear the text in my ears. It is easier to see mistakes or to see how a writer wants their story portrayed. Also another reason I like the reading out loud technique is because you can sense the pacing of the story. If the story is meant to be a thriller than the pace should be fast and exciting.

Secondly, when I tried the copy-and-delete strategy I realized how helpful it was. Reading a chunk of material and then reflecting on what was read helped me see parts of the story that I would not have otherwise. It is very easy to forget what you are reading when the story is complex and the notes help close that gap. Although because it is time consuming I did not choose this as my number one technique that I will use consistently in the future.

The timer strategy was not my preferred method because I do not like the sense of being rushed. I would not say I am a slow reader but I feel like knowing there is a timer going makes me feel rushed. Instead of focusing on the content in front of me I start to focus and wonder about the timer ticking away. The general idea about the method is good, but some strategies that work well for some do not for others. The importance is finding a strategy that works well for you and use it. In my case the timer strategy was not the best but does not mean it will not work for someone else.

Book Reading

Week 4 Storytelling: The Lost Prophets

Stiles stood in the streetlight on the cement pavement and watched the cars zoom past him in the pouring rain. It was a cold somber rainy day and Stiles could not believe the heart ache he was experiencing. His muscles grew tense, and his eyes  began to swell up with tears that were hidden from the rain. He couldn't believe he lost his beloved Malia. She was holding his hand tightly with a grasp that he felt would never let go. Then in the next moment  she was taken. Stiles was involved in bad business, gun smuggling to be exact. He thought he could steal their guns and get away with it, but he did not. It was his goal to save her from his mistakes and maybe even save her from himself. Stiles began to turn around from the spot in the street he was fixated on and headed towards his apartment in the south side of town. He started down on the street path and raised his right hand for a taxi and whistled loudly. A taxi arrived shortly and he got in.

Stiles was sitting on his couch and his body was turned in a way that was able to turn his head toward the big glass window that overlooked the bustling city beneath him. He was awaiting a knock on his door from his friend Rodger who was involved with the attempt to steal the guns from the gang The Lost Prophets. Rodger was a kindred spirit to Stiles. They were one in the same. They both had good intensions in life yet ended in the wrong place at the wrong time. As soon as the thought of Rodger faded from his mind he heard a knock at his door. Stiles quickly approached the door and turned it slightly. In the hallway of the apartment building stood Rodger.


" Hey Man, Sorry I tried to come as fast as I could."
  "Its ok, come in. We need to leave soon."

Rodger went and sat on his couch and crossed his arms together waiting to hear what was to come next.  Then Stiles began speaking.


"Alright so listen up Rodger, if this is gunna work this is what we will have to do . When we go at him we can't be careless. You and Pete will be split up one of you will go to the east side of the house and the other to the west. You both need to make sure you have a clear shot of the back deck. When I signal both of you put the red dots on his chest. I will go through the front with the bag of money and then like I said just wait for my signal."


After he was done Pete had arrived and let himself in and was perched next to Rodger on the couch. Both of them eyeing Stiles and tracing his face wondering if he may be bluffing. Instead Stiles stood there silently and waiting for a response but no one could say a thing. The men after a few moments of silence stood up and head for the door in agreement of what they were about to do. Stiles went ahead to get there first to set up their scheme.

Stiles arrived 20 short minutes later at the house where he told Jessie in the gang he will pay his due. Jessie said if he gives him 1,000,000 dollars than he will right his wrongs. Stiles got the money but no one dared ask him how. Stiles slowly creeped to the door holding tightly to the brown bag of money. The door opened and a big burly man stood in the doorway. Then gun shots started
blazing off in all directions and he hovered low and started to ran. He heard his buddies in the distance blazing their guns repeatedly and in an instant everything went blurry. He had been shot twice in the mid section of his body and the pain overcame him. Malia, who finally had been set free, ran to him and started profusely crying over his body. Soon she was shot and barely grasping for life as well and their arms crossed as her body crashed further into the ground.

Malia woke up the next morning in the hospital not understanding what was going on or where she was. She awakened to flowers and get well cards. She looked to her left and Rodger was standing there. He eventually broke the silence and told her of how the battle ended and how the gang ended up with the money. That Stiles was dead. As soon as those words broke into the air her heart sank. She could not believe her one true love was gone. Nothing could compare to the agony she felt until Rodger broke her the news.

"I know you do not want to hear this Malia but he did not just die. He was an organ donor and his blood type matched what you needed and his heart was given to you. You are alive because of him."

The words hung in the air for so long she did not know how much time has passed. The love he had for her was infinite and now she will always have his heart.







Author's Note: I wrote my story based off of the stories beginning from" The Rainy Season" and the next few chapter after. My character Stiles was based off Rama, who was upset at King Sugriva. He was annoyed that he was not helping him find Sita sooner. So instead he took some of the measures into his own hand and reached out to Lakshmana to go help them start more search parties across the land. I decided to turn my story darker because of the reality of the world these days. Some times people are not so lucky that things go wrong. Stiles died but he did what he set out to do, which was to save his love. Malia (Sita) was pure in heart and because of that was saved. Stiles and his friends, who represent King Sugriva and Lakshmana, were good people but surrounded by bad environment. I wanted my characters to have depth to them. They have good heart but never had a good role model. I wanted to provoke the question of what if Rama was not a good man? What if he was filled with greed. How different would the story be.  I also would like to say I got the name for the gang, "The Lost Prophets" from my husband. He said he wants some of the rights just in case my writings ever become famous.

References:
Narayan's Ramayana, Book Link
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Gun Shot Picture
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Reading Notes: Narayan's Ramayana, Part D

Earlier today I read through the rest of the version of the Ramayana that I chose to read. One chapter that stood out to me that could best fit my story was titled, "The Armies." During this time Rama gets infuriated with Sugriva, who promised to  find Sita. During this time the rainy season has come to an end and since Rama was getting nowhere with Sugriva so he called upon Lakshmana. He asked him if he could remind the monkey king about the promises he has made to him. I could use this circumstance by allowing my character to have a knock at his door be someone he works with. Then on their way to find my character that represents Sita, they are stopped. They run into one of his friends who says he wont let him save her without him. He in a way can represent Lakshmana. In the next scene Sita does eventually get saved and in my story so will my character. Stiles/ Rama can be in the streets with his acquaintance and his friend. They start running quicker until they end at an intersection. Stiles looks both ways and approaches a car. In the dark blue Porsche  a dark figured man with light-skinned hands stuck out his hand with a white piece of paper. Stiles will quickly look down at the paper and sighs. He is not sure what to do or think but he turns back to the two other men behind him and he motions them forward. The man in the Porsche drives away and they begin their journey. Stiles tells them they have to ride the bus outside of town. They both get into the bus and sit on different ends to avoid suspicion of what they are about to partake it. As my story comes to an end I will allow my character to be killed because of him wanting to save her and she gets badly injured and is only brought back to life because her lover was organ donor. He then saves her life in many forms. In a sense my story will symbolize Sita's purity of heart. I read on Wikipedia that Sita has been known for being pure and courageous. Usually the pure of heart always triumph in the end and that's how I want my story to be portrayed.





References:
Narayan's Ramayan, Link to Reading Guide D
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Reading Notes: Narayan's Ramayana, Section C

During the chapter, "The Rainy Season" in Narayan's Ramayana a massive rain has befallen on the land. The story is set up grim. Rama lost his beloved Sita and he has elected Surgriva to help him. I could begin my story with the same grim atmosphere leading into my tale. The setting can be in a city like Seattle, where rain can be never ending. The scene can start out on a street. There is a young man looking in both directions gasping for air all around him in the pouring rain. He sees a glimpse of light in his field of vision and he cannot quite make it out to be. Then he wakes up. I could have this character be Rama. He is having nightmares of losing his lover to be and that could set up my story to show what will be driving my narrative. Then I can describe the next scene as  being a completely different snap shot but it is of Malia, who will portray Sita. Malia is begging for these gun smugglers save her lovers life and to take pity on them. The smugglers agree and in exchange they take her. Just like in the story Sita in my story will still have her being taken but in a way this type of sacrifice will bring out the courageous and pure aspects of Sita that she is known for in the Indian myths/ beliefs. Then it snaps back to Rama/ Stiles and shows that he does not know why she was taken but that he wants to find her. I then can let him walk into this crowed street towards an apartment building and walk up to what will be his place and walk to his closet and uncover a 50 caliber, showing that he is about to take them on. Then there is an abrupt silence and a knock at his door and it could be someone who owes him a favor/ a really close friends who understands him and the relationship he shares with his lover. That person can resemble Surgriva. Then the story fades into some of the conquest they had to go through to save Sita.







References:
Narayan's Ramayana Link to Reading Guide C
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